


Neon Fades

by maxsaystowrite



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Angst, F/M, One-Sided Attraction, one sided timsasha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:00:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24917986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maxsaystowrite/pseuds/maxsaystowrite
Summary: Tim and Sasha have a night out together filled with drinks, dancing, and unspoken feelings. They have such a good time together, Tim wonders when they could do it again.
Relationships: Sasha James/Tim Stoker
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	Neon Fades

**Author's Note:**

> I think they're neat...

_ The black one. The black one would be good,  _ Tim thought looking at his closet. There's a row of all his button-downs on the top of his closet. They're organized by color because I always made the most sense to him. He pulled the black one from its spot and held it up to himself in the mirror. He wondered if it was too formal, they were just going out for some dancing and some drinks. Nothing special, nothing fancy.

_ But she's special _ , Tim's brain argued. He threw the black one on his bed as a maybe.  _ She doesn't even like you like that, she's told you that.  _ Tim pulled out another black one, this one with roses dotted as a pattern.  _ And that won't change even if you get her to sleep with you again.  _ Tim pulled out a red shirt, then a blue, then some stripes, and a green, trying to get as neutral as possible. Red was passionate, black was adult and promising. 

Tim stared at his options and decided he hated all of them, making a mental note to go shopping next weekend.  _ Maybe the "baby slut" shirt and the Jean jacket. Would she think that's funny? _ No, he decided, she wouldn't. Because she said he could have looked nicer for Martin's birthday, so she would probably want him dressed  _ nicely _ for their date. 

_ Not a date,  _ he reminded himself. They were going to a bar, together, on a Saturday night. Jon was invited, and so was Martin. Though, Martin muttered something about his mother and Jon gave a stern "I will think about it" which was basically a no flat out.

They were coworkers, going out for a drink. And he had to look good for it.

Anything that was work appropriate was out for sure. His eyes turned to what Sasha affectionately called his bi collection. Horrendously colored button-downs that not even retired grandpas could pull off. She told him once he dressed like a lesbian. 

_ "When I first saw you I thought you were a butch and I already decided I was going to marry you."  _ She had told him. He asked why him being a man changed that. She said butch lesbians and men are two vastly different things and she couldn't even begin to explain how it changed everything.

Sasha liked the brightly colored shirts, unbuttoned as low as he was able. Tim pulled out his most obnoxious Hawaiian shirt, orange with large puffins scattered around it.  _ This one's perfect.  _ He paired it with dark washed jeans, cuffed at the bottom, and his solid black Doc Martin's.  _ Maybe I do dress like a lesbian. _

With his naturally high cheekbones, Tim never understood contouring. He thought he looked like a Halloween decoration. He did, however, love eye makeup, and painted his eyes orange and black to match his puffins. Added details came from his dangling earrings and a fake septum piercing. He couldn't work up the courage to keep any sort of lip on but by the time he removed the last failed attempt his lips were so red, they stood out on their own. His cologne stuck to his skin and clothes so thoroughly he only needed a small spray for the evening. 

Tim looked into the mirror at himself, dressed to impress. Dressed to party.  _ You're just going out with a friend. That's it. _

**Tim:**

**-im calling the Uber now, see you in 10 •̀.̫•́✧**

He wandered around his flat for a moment, waiting for a response. He fought the urge to snack, he nearly took a shot of his own supply. The phone buzzed on the counter and he jumped on it. 

**Sasha:**

**-Awesome! See you when you get here!**

Tim's heart was beating rapidly the entire car ride, his lungs couldn't keep up. His chest felt white-hot as sweat-drenched the back of his neck. If there was any length to his nails he would have peeled them off. If he had spent one more moment in the car, he would have started chipping at the polish.

And it all slowed down when the car pulled up to the club where Sasha was waiting on the curb. She was looking around, trying to spot Tim. Her top was mesh on the shoulders, the solidified on her abdomen, tucking into her silver skirt. Sasha's curls cascaded down her back with a bun on top and two tendrils framing her face. Her round glasses glinted in the neon and reflected back pinks and purples instead of her dark eyes. 

Tim felt every millisecond stitch through his skin when he pulled himself out of the car and Sasha saw him. Her face lit up like a firework, exploding into colors of joy and excitement. 

"TIM!" She called before running to him. She jumped into his arms and he caught her, holding her close by her waist. Her grip was tight around his neck and Tim could feel his heart calm. She had that effect on him, she was so easy to be around. 

"Sasha! You look gorgeous!" He said into her hair. She pulled away from the hug so Tim could see her roll her eyes. "You always look  _ spectacular _ but you can only do so much with old man Bouchard's dress code."

Sasha snorted at the thought of it. "God if I have to buy one more oversized knit sweater because my others are  _ too revealing _ I'm going to report him myself." She let out another laugh. "I mean how much of a dick do you need to be to police a v-neck?"

"I've never had a problem with your v-necks," Tim offered and Sasha gave him a tight smile before a small shove. 

"Yeah cause your eyes are never where they should be." Sasha broke into a wider smile, toothy, and crooked to the left. "Now, won't you shut up so we can start getting fucked up?"

Tim bowed to her, bending at the waist and extending his hand. "After you, my lady." In his lean, he looked up to her, giving her his most charming smile.  _ She really is radiant, like a queen. _

Sasha rolled her eyes again and took his hand, dragging him along into the club. The bouncer let them through with a wink from Sasha. 

"You know him?" Tim asked, trying to get a good glimpse of him.  _ Why would Sasha  _ **_wink_ ** _ at  _ **_him_ ** _? _

"Yeah, Frank lives in the flat below me. We go to the same cafe 'round the corner." She said, pulling him to the dance floor. 

The music was so loud Tim could feel it on his toes. The beat rattled his chest and got his heart to the same speed. Sasha's hands were on his as she started to lead him in a dance that was a blur of feet and hips moving on offbeats and downbeats. She'd press her back to his chest and have him move his body in time with hers.

Tim's skin burned at her touch. Everything about her ignited him. He existed in a wholly electric state around her. Tim was light-headed the moment he saw her. 

And when the contact stopped it was an immediate loss, bringing him back to where he was.  In heels, she was taller than him by at least four inches. She leaned toward his ear and he could smell the perfume on her neck.

"I need a drink," she said, close enough where he could only hear her. 

Tim pulled her backwards towards the bar, never breaking eye contact. Sasha tried to hold it but couldn't without laughing. Tim smooshed himself in-between two bar stools of two different parties. There was barely enough room for him when Sasha squeezed herself between them too. He popped himself on his tiptoes.

"What do you want? I'm buying." 

Sasha snorted. She knew how much they made and wouldn't be so eager to pay for £11 cocktails per person herself. “You choose if you’re buying.”

Tim broke out a huge grin. “Well then, Sasha James, have you ever had a Liquid Marijuana?” He turned to the bartender and ordered two of them. 

“Liquid what? Is that like a marijuana flavored beer or something? And import from America?” She questioned, watching the bartender as he poured rum and pineapple juice into a mixer along with multiple other brightly liquors. 

Tim laughed into her shoulder. “That sounds fucking disgusting, Sasha, why would anyone ever want to  _ drink _ weed? That shit’s rank. You smoke it to get high not cause you  _ like _ it.” 

Tim pulled the drinks forwards from the bartender and placed one in Sasha’s hand. The concoction was a deep teal with blue curacao and melon liqueur. It smelled like a smoothie. 

“Please, do you know how many guys in secondary school thought liking it was a personality trait? Then proceeded to explain to me exactly how much he loved reeking of it on the weekends?” Sasha took a sip of her drink in between her story, her eyes going wide. “Oh, that’s juice, Tim. I’m fucked.”

Tim tilted his drink back, feeling the cool alcohol run down his throat, willing the placebo effect to kick in and make him drunker than he was. “It’s alright, we’ll get shit faced together and wake up in Paris!”

Sasha giggled into her cup. “Paris? Have you ever been to Paris drunk?” She looked up at him from the rim of her cup, eyes reflecting the lights from her bar. 

Tim’s heart skipped a beat. “It’s the only way I’ve ever been to Paris, love.”

She raised her eyebrows at him. “You’ve only seen Paris drunk?”

“Yes, I have, three times actually. The last time I nearly fell off that one bridge.”

Sasha cackled and her voice carried over as the song ended. “Do you know how many bridges there are in Paris?”

“I can’t count when I’m sober, Sasha, I was a history major.”

Sasha laughed into her cup before tilting her head back and finishing off the glass. Tim looked down at his own drink, deciding to chug the rest. He normally liked to drink them slowly to spend the night building to a wobbling haze. That was obviously not Sasha's pace, at least not tonight. 

She slammed the empty cup down on the bar with a wild grin. "Can I pick the next?"

"On my tab?" 

"Absolutely."

"Go for it."

Sasha pushed herself closer to the bartender so he could hear her. Tim watched as the both of them laughed. The petty, jealous part of him gnawed at his stomach and told him to place a hand on her waist, to press closer to her, to show anyone and everyone that she belonged to  _ him. _ But she didn't. She couldn't. Not to mention the horribly sexist implications of him calling her  _ his _ , he couldn't make that claim because she was never his. Sasha was not his to lose nor his to win. She was just a person, a friend, and if he chose to love her, that was on him.

She turned back to him with two shots in hand, both a diluted cream color. "Tim Stoker, would you like an orgasm?"

A laugh erupted from him before he could say anything else, taking the shot from her hands. "Since you asked so nicely, I think I will." 

They shared a smile before shooting back. Tim felt a cool burn run down his throat, mint, and cream sticking to the roof of his mouth. He coughed. "I think that was the best orgasm I've ever had! Thanks, Sasha!"

Sasha snickered to herself, nose scrunching up and chin tucked into her neck. "It was a  _ pleasure, _ love."

They continued to rack up the bill throughout the night ordering weird shots and brightly colored drinks. They sunk into a moving swirl of a state, colors and people blended together in their vision. Tim paid the tab and Sasha pulled him onto the floor for more dancing. They got closer than before, fingertips touching skin, their breaths mixing between them. Tim tried to watch her as she danced while he felt all the heat from her body. She looked like an angel, swirling and moving, young and so alive.

Her ankle suddenly wobbled and she almost fell over, grasping at Tim. Sasha laughed into his chest and pulled herself up to his ear. 

“I’m hungry. Let’s go get some chips.” Sasha said.

“Yeah, let’s get out of here.”

Tim pulled her towards the exit. London was different at this time of night, the only sounds coming from the clubs that were still open and the people in them. If you stayed close to the strip, there was no fear of silence or the dark. “I know this place down the way a bit,” Sasha said. She led the way, heels clicking against the cobblestone. The sound of the music and the crowd growing softer as the neon fades into darkness.

If he didn’t know better, Tim would have thought she was trying to get him alone. But he knew better, so when she wrapped her two arms around his right and placed her head on his shoulder, he knew she was just drunk and using him for stability. It was almost too hot for it, July humidity seeping into the last week of June early.

The chips smelled like grease and salt and Tim’s stomach growled from an empty pit. Without even asking Sasha, he ordered two large baskets of their plain chips. 

“How do you like ‘em, Sash?” He asked, grabbing the curry sauce for himself. 

“Just ketchup for me.” She called as she fished in her wallet for enough cash to pay. Instead, she just handed over her card.

  
  


“On top or on the side?”

“On top, I’m not a monster.”

Tim drowned the baskets in their respective sauces and handed Sasha’s to her when she was ready. She tipped a chip to him before taking a bite. She groaned.

“ _ Oh _ my god, this is exactly what I’ve needed.  _ Oh _ !” 

"Out of all the reasons I thought you'd be moaning tonight, chips were not on the list," Tim said, watching her take chip after chip.

Sasha raised an eyebrow at him. "Stoker you could never make me moan louder than these hot greasy chips after a night of drinking and that's just a fact."

Tim gave her a sideways smile. "Is that a challenge?"

"Most definitely not," Sasha said, tone flat but not unkind. She was still smiling at him and his heart was still doing flips in his chest. That was the thing about Sasha, even with a rejection and teasing, there was no malice or hurt. She was a cool breeze, so light and crisp everything about her made him breathe easy. Her soft curls and intoxicating laugh made him swoon. 

It didn't matter that Sasha rejected him, that she didn't feel the same way, Tim was lost to her. And there was nothing he could do about it. After their first fling, Sasha was quick to shut anything else down. 

_ I had an amazing time, Tim, I did. But I can't… I can't do this. _

And he understood, he'd never push her into anything she didn't want. The why didn't matter, just the "no" did. Tim was falling for her faster and faster with every smile or the way she lifts her entire head of dark brown hair when she was frustrated, only to drop it back down so it could circle her completely. He was free falling and it was all his own problem. 

Tim tried his hardest to get rid of his feelings, to douse them before they could burn him alive. But loving her was innate. There was no learned behavior. Tim had a predisposition to love her. He was always supposed to love her. And he made peace with the fact that she had no tendencies herself. All Tim could do was hope she may give him a chance. 

As they walked the quiet London streets, Sasha began to slow and wobble.

" _ Fuck  _ me, my feet hurt." She mumbled, abruptly stopping by bracing herself on Tim's shoulder. Her finger slipped between her ankle and her strap, loosening the hold and giving her irritated skin a break. "These shoes are going to be the death of me." 

Tim looked at her with pity. His shoes were meant for long term use and he never quite understood how people walked in heels for too long.  _ If we could get her off her feet, she'd feel better _ , he thought. And then it hit him. 

"Get on my back." 

Sasha blinked at him. "Excuse me?" 

"Take off your shoes, I'm giving you a piggyback ride so your feet don't hurt."

Sasha let out a laugh as she popped her shoe off. She shrunk down to her normal height and took the other off. "Alright Stoker, no complaining. You're the one who offered."

"I'd never." 

Tim took her heels from her and crouched down slightly. Sasha braced herself on his shoulders, then jumped. He pulled her legs up high as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She got comfortably on the curve of his back. Tim could already feel the ache start to set in, though he wouldn't dream of voicing any complaint. He accepted that he was going to be sore in the morning. 

"Take me home, you remember the way," Sasha whispered in his ear. He hummed in agreement as she laid her head on his shoulder, tucking her face beside his neck. Her breathing became even against his skin. "Hm, 'ou smell good."

Tim retraced their steps back to the club and then two blocks over. Her flat was on the ground floor at the back of the hall. He reached behind to her bag hanging on their side for her keys. He fished it out by the koala keychain that Sasha always had in her hand. The lock was difficult to get open with just one hand when his arm was hooked on her leg, but he managed to get it open anyway.

Moonlight and lamp light mixed in the cool colored flat, blanketing it in pale illumination. Tim didn't touch the switch, just maneuvering between sofas and coffee tables to her room. Small and neat, she had an iron frame that squeaked as he laid her down carefully on the mattress. Sasha didn't stir as he took a throw from the couch to place over her. 

Tim left that night, despite still being drunk and tired. It wasn't his place to be there when she woke up, even if he was just on the floor or the armchair. The door locked automatically behind him, very useful for a woman who lived alone. He was resigned to the end of the night, still buzzing from her touch and laughter.

*

"How about we go out again like we did a few weeks ago?" Tim asked. 

Sasha was going through a file cabinet, trying to find a written statement about a taxidermy shop in Barnet. Her nails didn't stop flipping the folders as she looked up at him. Her bright blue eyes shocked him for a moment, they were so intense his heart always stopped when he saw them. 

"I don't think my boyfriend would like that..."

Tim groaned and rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah. This boyfriend of yours doesn't seem to like anything."

"Hey! Be nice, I'm dating him after all."

"Lord knows why. You barely talk about him. I don't even know his name!" 

Sasha sighed and pulled away from the cabinet to face him completely. She came down from her tips toes and she let her blonde bangs fall into her eyes. 

"It's not that simple, Tim, he's private. It took him this long to even let me call him my boyfriend."

_ I wouldn't hesitate,  _ Tim thought.  _ I'd scream from the rooftop that I was yours. _ This thought process wasn't helpful. That didn't stop him from thinking it. 

"I just..." Tim took a step towards her, neck craning as he looked down towards her. "I miss you, Sasha. I feel like since you started seeing this guy, I haven't seen you. We were so close and now we're practically strangers."

Sasha bit her lip. Tim scanned her face for any emotion he could pinpoint. Instead, he got lost in her endless eyes and flawless skin. His own scars started to burn, he could feel the holes that the silver worms ate through him and wondered how she managed to get away with nothing. Of course, if they were under her clothes he'd have no opportunity to see them. 

"I don't know, Tim… he's very..."

He took another step forward. "Sasha… are you okay? Is he hurting you?" Tim reached for her hand and she pulled away quickly.

"Christ, Tim! No! Of course not!" She said, voice high and squeaking. His brow knitted together, it wasn't a very convincing performance. Sasha sighed and took his hand. "I'd tell you if…  _ anything _ like that was happening. I've just been preoccupied."

Tim squeezed her hand, trying to give her a comforting firmness. "You promise you're okay?" He asked. 

Sasha squeezed back and flashed her winning right-leaning smile. Tim felt the chip on his shoulder completely melt along with his heart. "I promise."

Tim smiled back, whipping her forward and wrapping his arms around her shoulders. "Well then, Ms. James. Since you're so very okay, and your boyfriend is also  _ very okay _ , maybe I could have you both over to my flat for some wine and cheese."

Sasha laughed as they walked out of the file room. "You hardly know his name and you want to shmooze over soft cheeses?"

Tim shrugged and pulled her closer. " What can I say? I want to have a little chat with whoever took you away from me."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I have more TMA fics if you're interested! I also have some TAZ fics and TPP fics as well! Kudos and comments are appreciated! Thanks again!


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